The Reckoner!

Note: for the folks who have seen either AvP or AvP II: Forgettable Subtitle, you have my sympathies. They may have been somewhat cagey on who wins the Alien vs. Predator battle, but they proved that in the battle between Paul W.S. Anderson and the audience's brain, Paul W.S. Anderson always wins.

Heavyweight match: Who's the winner Alien vs. Predator?

I know, I know, I know -- there were two movies about the clash of these space creatures, but who the heck saw them? I know I didn't... nor would anyone else I know admit to seeing them, at least not in the movie theater! So let's pretend they never happened.

Let's say Don King is staging a fight in Atlantic City's Boardwalk Hall. It's the night of the fight. In one corner there is Alien with his big, black shiny dome skull and jutting drawer-like jaw spewing corrosive saliva all over the ring, and it's ready to go -- remember not to injure him or his acidic blood will chew through the mat and we'll all end up in the basement of the Hall (or perhaps China). In the other corner you have Predator looking for a new skull trophy and there is a big one to be had tonight. He has his ability to become invisible and don't forget that laser gun on top his metal-like shoulder pad....but then again, don't injure the Alien.

You get the picture, Reckonauts, you've seen both Alien and Predator at work and play. What say you... where do you place your wager?

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Reckoning Comments!

Gotta go Alien on this one.  It's as Ash says in the original Alien, before Ripley shuts him up for good -- they're basically biologically perfect killing machines.  They have that intensely corrosive blood, ability to skulk around undetectedly, and most importantly, zero personality besides the vindictive pursuit of death.

I always thought that Predators were a little too humanized, especially in cases like the end of Predator 2.  It basically just makes them look like ordinary big-game hunters with really, really good equipment.  If you put the invisibility equipment and the laser armament in your local Cabella's, you could pretty much get an ordinary human to kick as much ass.  Can't do that with an Alien.

My secret shame revealed.  I saw both AVP movies in the theater.  The best moment of the two has to be when the awkward sexual tension between the predator and the female scientist from the first AVP comes to a head.  So awkward...

Anywho, Predator wins.  No doubt about it.  The Aliens win based numbers and surprise, but in a one on one fight that removed those elements, a single Predator should be able to take down a single Alien. 

Oh dear God, there was sexual tension between Predators and people in the first AVP movie?  That's just f-ed up right there.

I gotta go with Dan on this.... I spent some time at Cabela's on Monday, and they def had everything that predator would have used, other than the invisibility component, but you get enough cammo on, the point in moot. and the creepy sexual tension... ack!

AVP wasn't that bad.  Alien Resurrection was far worse in my opinion.  If you went to see AVP expecting a "good" (i.e. Oscar Nomination worthy) movie, then mores the fool you... in fact I have some real estate in Brooklyn I want to talk to you about.

As for the question: in a straight up, one on one fight, the Predator wins every time.  The Aliens beat you with numbers.

Hah! I'd forgotten about Alien Resurrection -- and now I'm going to have to work on forgetting it again. Jeunet was not a good fit for that material, not by a long shot.

Things seemed to have worked out pretty well for Joss Whedon since then, though.

The Reckoner!